Why is England?
Mother has a bee in her bonnet over the mysterious disappearance of Robert Denby, and she’s sending me to London in her private jet. Of course I’m going! You’re a braver person […]
Author Archives: Steve Colegrove
Ten Careers To Consider If You’ve Gone Mad And Decided To Become a Writer
Writing is literally an insane proposition: lock yourself in a closet and pound away at a post-apocalyptic vampire brony crossover series so that people you will never meet in real […]
Watch This, Don’t Read That
It’s universally accepted among dentists and convicted felons that a movie is better than a book. In the style of the ubiquitous “Eat This, Not That” series, I present the […]
The Denby Files––Acclaimed Male Model Now Missing in Action
HOLLYWOOD, CA––The elusive Robert Denby, well-known catalog model and face of the recently published novel, The Amish Spaceman, disappeared from his loft apartment in West Hollywood yesterday. According to alleged […]
My Pants Are On Fire
In the past week I’ve spent several 28-hour days at a peculiarly popular southern California theme park. I am happy to inform everyone that visiting theme parks as a ‘thing’ […]
Sexy Post of Valentine Fornication
I’ve been told by an elderly relative that sex sells, but in my particular case it’s always been a net drain on the old bank account. Who can tell? Life’s […]
Meme Overload, Quote Destruction
What’s worse than padding a blog post with overused Internet memes? Nothing. Here’s another favorite quote from my book, The Amish Spaceman: “Shut up and listen, former ex-boyfriend.” Joanie turned, […]
Author Simulator 2014
Do you have too much free time? Do you gape in awe at the glittering piles of treasure surrounding the famous authors of our time, and think, ‘That could be […]
Didney Worl
If you’d like to review The Amish Spaceman in exchange for a Post-Release Advance Review Copy (in other words, the book), then send me a message. Email, carrier pigeon, it’s […]
Favorite Quote from the Book
An imaginary child I passed in the street today asked me what was my favorite line in “The Amish Spaceman.” It’s difficult to separate out specific lines, much in the […]
Amish Spaceman Meme Party Deux
Copies are going fast! Hurry and get one before the elves at Amazon put on a strike. They have to type each one by hand, you know! The Amish Spaceman […]
The Amish Spaceman Available Now!
The Amish Spaceman is available at Amazon for $2.99. I wanted to have a party in honor of this momentous occasion, but since mother and the cat are the only […]
Amish Spaceman: The Soundtrack
Questions are floating through your mind right now. Who’s this devilishly handsome author? What’s a book soundtrack? Where are my pants? I can only help you with the second question, as […]
The Spaceman Cometh
The publication date of my third novel, The Amish Spaceman, is approaching rapidly, and in fact, will happen within the next few days. Not since Halley’s Comet crossed the skies […]
Pick-Up Lines Worse Than Mine
One would think that no pick-up line could be worse than “Is this your condom? I think you dropped it,” but after many hours of clandestine research in female dormitories […]
Tyrolean Goat Milk Ice Cream
Only the abnormal would aspire to be a writer. Would anyone else but the mentally imbalanced lock themselves in a room away from other people, day after day, typing away […]
Keep on Booking That Face
I applaud the fact that more and more young people spend their days and nights on the long-form poetry of social media communication. As adults we should strive for one-hundred-percent […]
The Amish Spaceman 