Peanut
Nobody respects the poor peanut. He used to be the man, the star, the dapper danny who danced across a million commercials on a million screens. He used to a […]
Author Archives: Steve Colegrove
Throwing Stars For Your Conversation
Social butterflies like me have a few weapons in our arsenal when the conversation flags or when it has died and gone to bed, the sort of hypothetical questions that […]
2013 Amazon Breakthrough Novel Awards First Round
“A Girl Called Badger” made it past the first round of competitors in Amazon’s 2013 Breakthrough Novel Award, Science Fiction category. Fingers crossed that the book makes it further. 2013 […]
My Fan-nie Valentine
Some of you who know me or work in small-claims court have raised concerns about the novel such as “You can’t be serious,” “People pay money for this?” and “If […]
You Know It Is Problem
It is problem when: 1. you’re writing fan mail to yourself because the only people who bought your 1000-page Cuban/high fantasy mashup “Lord of the Mambo Kings” were your mom […]
The Vorpal Stick of Justice
When you grow up with the same people (whether family, friends, or wards of the state) there’s a shared set of experiences. But even with “sharing” similar experiences and YouTube […]
Post-Virus Struggle To Survive Girl
I go down to coffee shop because book is out. Brother work in coffee shop––so what? My family not have cigar factory and own car and use paper money like […]
And Lo, The Book
And so, the book has come forth. But hark, cast thine eyes upon yonder slightly tubby and balding gentleman, with fists full of rubles, gold, and gems beautiful like diamonds […]
GIGO The Voyager
You know that old saw, “garbage in, garbage out”? I thought for years that was just a phrase about garbage, and now I’ve been told it applies to the body. […]
Blog The Destroyer
I spent a fistful of hours last night writing an article on how to write better (and more better), then I thought to myself, “This is rubbish. Drivel. Putrefying cack.” So […]
Self-Defense For The Self-Published
You may not be mobbed for autographs while buying goat-milk ice cream at Whole Foods, but the self-published author still needs a plan of self-defense. Anger and brute strength will […]
The Stick
Do things ever annoy you? I know they must, because you keep shoving messages under my door. Writing ProTip: crayon dilutes the impact of your thesis. Burrs under my […]
Urine A Lot of Trouble
If an adult beverage is strong enough to make blood leave your person, is that a good thing? From a marketing perspective, of course. “Our vodka will murder your kidneys!” […]
Steves Are Boring
I was going to post the first pages of chapter one but I spilled Diet A&W on it and the cat got scared and threw up. In the FAX machine […]
The Itinerant
If the authorities haven’t mentioned this, I will––I have problems finding a place to write. The library is too quiet. Come on, loser––TOO quiet? Well, come on yourself … If […]
These are mine and I wrote them
Language is fantastic. We can use it to create completely unique sentences, never before uttered in the history of mankind. However, we mostly just say things like “I’m going to […]
September 30th Book Updates
Updates on the books. As an added treat, Miles O’Keefe! (I’m kidding––It’s actually from my year in Quiz Bowl.) A Girl Called Badger –– Cover in the final stages. Hint: […]
